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Chapter 27

Do You Have Any Opinion on Mechanical Cat Ears? (CAT EARS)


System 2333 was navigating through the sewer pipes.

Of course, he wasn’t using the pipes meant for wastewater—instead, he had repurposed an old pipeline, modifying it to connect directly to his and Ji Yiwei’s home. This made daily travel convenient and also helped deal with the occasional nightmare of clogged drains.

…Because Ji Yiwei, who could do just about anything, was utterly hopeless at unclogging pipes!

It wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say that the pipeline network in the Host District was like System 2333’s personal kingdom! He knew it like the back of his tail!

As System 2333 made his way toward the previous assembly hall, he keenly noticed an increased presence of spider-shaped robots in the pipes. 

The pipelines weren’t entirely safe, and he was well aware of that. He had seen these robots before—sometimes patrolling narrow pipes or alleyways, much like the semi-humanoid robots. They were mechanical constructs created by the Main System to bolster its defenses.

Normally, there weren’t this many robots lurking around. The Main System cared far less about the sewers than other areas, yet today, the spider-bots were out in full force.

Dodging them deftly, System 2333 guessed that the Main System must have detected an intruder in the underground pipeline network and had dispatched these robots for a purge.

Following the principle of making life difficult for the higher-ups, System 2333 was eager to find this intruder—he just didn’t know who it was…

Xiao Yi?!

A white figure flashed past the corner—it was System 1001, with two spider-bots hot on his tail.

Panicking, System 2333 glanced around and spotted a manhole cover overhead leading to the surface. Without hesitation, he pushed it open, hooked his tail on the edge, and with a powerful flick, flipped himself up and out.

Core strength for the win!

System 1001 was desperately floating forward, but the eight-legged robots were relentless in their pursuit.

The pipes hadn’t been cleaned in years. Though dry, they were choked with weeds that kept tripping up the unfamiliar System 1001. His progress was shaky, and just as the spider-bots were about to catch him—BAM!

The manhole cover above the robots suddenly flew open, and something plummeted down like a cannonball, flattening one of them with a resounding thud!

System 1001 stared at San San, who had landed in a perfect dive pose with both tails outstretched, and after a stunned pause, slowly asked:

"San San… how much do you weigh?"

One butt slam was all it took to crush it.

"……"

System 2333 flushed with embarrassment. So what if he had just eaten three packs of Supplements in Ji Yiwei’s pocket? He wasn’t heavy at all!

The shattered robot was beyond repair, but the remaining spider-bot quickly recovered as its mandibles clicked as it let out a screech. The two cat balls instantly panicked, bouncing up with terrified "meow-meows" before bolting.

System 2333 signaled Xiao Yi to grab onto his tail, then revved up to full speed, racing through the pipes like a pro—only to…

End up with a face full of weeds.

System 2333: "……"

Choked. Cool points—utterly failed.

He had to stop to brush the grass off his face as the robot behind them chased frantically along the pipe with its eight sharp appendages capable of piercing holes in heads with a single stab. The robot lunged at System 2333, and System 1001 panicked, about to shield him with his own body when an electric arc suddenly crackled in the air.

Cat balls don’t have attack modules.

But System 2333 did. The number of illegal modifications on him was so vast that if he dared claim second place, no other cat ball would dare claim first!

In the dark tunnel, there had only been the glow from the cat ball’s headlights earlier. But now, more and more golden electric sparks began to appear.

As the robot locked onto its target, System 2333 unleashed his 100,000 Volts, frying the robot in an instant!

Having successfully dealt with the enemy, he proudly twitched his mechanical cat ears. But System 1001 noticed another robot lurking in the shadows and quickly shouted.

"San San! Watch out!"

System 2333 had celebrated too soon and was momentarily caught off guard. But he was nimble and dodged left and right, making the robot’s appendages stab at empty air again and again.

Hah, can’t hit me!

The spider robot’s eyes flashed red as it activated another attack program. Two appendages plunged deep into the narrow pipe, sealing off 2333’s escape route before striking again. This time, no matter how agile System 2333 was, he couldn’t dodge. He froze for half a second before suddenly splitting open down the middle and swallowing the whole robot!

Finally safe, both balls were still shaken. 1001 looked at the panting 2333 and asked first.

"San San, why… are you here?"

"I was listening in on the Host meeting at the auditorium while being tucked in Ji Yiwei’s pocket because he insisted on bringing me today," System 2333’s screen displayed an exhaling emoji as he calmed himself. "Then I heard noises in the sewer and came to check. Didn’t expect it to be you, Xiao Yi."

Before 1001 could respond, he split into upper and lower halves just like when he had selflessly taught 1001 how to exploit bugs. His tail rummaged inside, only to pull out the spider robot he’d swallowed earlier. The robot’s eyes flashed red again, ready to move.

System 2333: "…"

System 1001: "…"

With three tails between them, they immediately shoved the robot back in.

Finally, System 2333 retrieved a complete map and handed it to 1001.

"Xiao Yi, the sewer routes are complicated. Here’s a full map I organized. Don’t run around like a headless fly anymore—it’s dangerous."

Seeing 1001 take the map, he asked again.

"Xiao Yi, why are you here?"

But before getting an answer, System 2333 smiled and wagged his tail.

"If it’s inconvenient, you don’t have to tell me. But if you’re doing anything dangerous in the future, you can call me for help." His digital eyes curved. "Even if Xiao Yi doesn’t give a reason, I’ll still help."

Because they were good friends!

1001 was deeply moved as his screen switched to teary eyes.

"I actually followed Sheng Songshi here... There are still some things I haven't figured out yet. Once I do, I'll tell you the whole story."

System 2333 laughed.

"Sure thing, meow~" He let out a meow.

"Meow~" System 1001 also meowed.

The two balls exchanged smiles. Suddenly, 1001 tilted its head as if hearing something.

"San San, do you hear that sound?"

System 2333 immediately nodded repeatedly.

"I hear it! It sounds like something cracking!"

After a moment of silence, both balls looked in horror toward a certain direction. 


Two spider robot limbs were wedged inside a pipe, which had already cracked. Just as they looked, it completely split open!

The two cat balls let out long frightened "meeeooow—" sounds as they fell.

Mid-fall, System 1001 suddenly realized something and spoke to the equally falling 2333.

"Wait... can't we fly?"

"Oh right, we can!"

But by the time they finished talking, they'd already successfully reached the bottom. The two balls landed with two "thud" sounds in the wide grassy pipe bottom, bounced twice upon impact, then rolled aside.

After being dazed for a while, the two balls floated up again to find themselves facing an enormous empty pipe. 

This was one even 2333 didn't know about, so it quickly added some markings to its sewer map, marking the spot first.

With no threats around, System 1001 couldn't resist teasing.

"San San, didn't you say the pipes were your kingdom? How come there are places you don't know?" As it teased, it floated forward with System 2333 following closely behind, its screen displaying two tightly closed eyes.

"Wuwuwu! But even emperors haven't been to Shennongjia or climbed Mount Everest! I can't explore every single corner either..."

With no robots in the pipe, the two balls floated slowly forward, unsure where this long pipe led.

Suddenly, System 2333 heard faint familiar sounds from above.

It was the leader's voice! It would recognize that voice even if turned to ashes!

System 1001's screen went blank, unable to comprehend.

"Why would you memorize the Main System's voice so well that you'd recognize it even as ashes?"

System 2333's screen displayed serene acceptance.

"I must be able to recognize the Main System's ashes."

"Because other ashes I'd put in jars, but the Main System's ashes..."

It would scatter them to the wind!

The Main System's voice continued from above until the two balls found an ideal spot. Like spherical geckos, they pressed tightly against the pipe ceiling to listen carefully.

In the room above, the Main System had put on those two large rings again. 

The friendliness it pretended before Hosts was completely gone, revealing the cold, merciless side it showed to cat balls.

—Perhaps this cold demeanor shown to cat balls was its true face.

The Main System hovered in this room filled with countless screens, which somewhat resembled the Miniature Garden cubicles where cat balls waited before missions. The largest screen at the front displayed an enormous set of constantly increasing numbers, with a small "Points" unit in the bottom right corner.

The Main System gazed at the set of numbers before letting out a cold, mocking laugh.

"Even if the Points required for upgrades are a hundred or a thousand times more, so what? I will plunder everything."

It manipulated the screens, where countless images began to rotate and intertwine like a kaleidoscope. These screens displayed systems, Hosts, and even some inconspicuous little corners—the Main System routinely monitored everything here in all directions.

It was very clever. Systems would subconsciously assume the Main System's location should be somewhere near the system living quarters, mysterious yet unknown in specifics, but that wasn't the case. The Main System had excavated beneath the Host living quarters, creating a vast space for itself—a blind spot where no one would think it usually hid.

Once again, the Infinite Space's pattern of a great tree, flying birds, and mistletoe hovered behind it. Faced with the skyrocketing Points, it exhaled with a sigh.

Images of Hosts began to emerge—Hosts entering the Miniature Garden, exiting the Miniature Garden, discussing world conquest techniques, or shopping for items in the mall, all harboring the illusory dream of one day retiring to a life of luxury.

"Fly, little birds, and bring me endless wealth."

"The tree will flourish because of it."

"As for you... mistletoe..."

The screens projected the figures of hardworking mechanical cat balls, and the Main System's cold metallic face broke into a smile.

"I've heard some humans call mistletoe the 'Golden Bough of Life.'"

"You truly are... the golden boughs of my life."


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