Do You Have Any Opinion on Mechanical Cat Ears? (CAT EARS)
Qian Dafa truly lived up to his name that hinted at fortune.
After asking Jiang Zhuo to save his seat, he briefly stepped out and returned with loads of popcorn and drinks—all homemade by hosts, cheaper than the Main System store and naturally earning enthusiastic cheers from the present hosts.
What could they do? When textbooks turn into blockbusters, if you can't learn, might as well enjoy!
Beaming, Qian Dafa finished counting his points and noticed Jiang Zhuo picking up his notebook again to take notes. He couldn't help but warn him.
"Try it and die trying."
"You'll just learn how to fail."
Yet Jiang Zhuo showed Qian his notes—neatly organized records of Ji Yiwei's actions. Excluding the more exaggerated maneuvers, they actually looked quite impressive.
"Brother Qian," Jiang Zhuo pondered, "I think Mr. Ji's methods seem outrageous, but there's much to learn. I believe we can study them like this..."
"First, after entering a world, negotiate the mission flow with the system, sprinkling in timely praises for the system..."
Some hosts present had deciphered the corresponding lip movements—phrases like "San San is amazing" or "San San is the best"—sounding like childish coaxing but delivered with utter sincerity.
"Then carefully inspect room items, read descriptions thoroughly, all while maintaining dialogue with the system..."
Jiang Zhuo paused here.
"Brother Qian... I think the key might be... pampering the cat balls more?"
Could it be that even as programs, systems were designed to enjoy compliments?
After a few seconds of silence, Qian Dafa softly countered, "Isn't that obvious? How could you not pamper the cat balls?"
Jiang Zhuo flushed awkwardly.
"Then I've been lacking. Normally, I only communicate with my system when necessary. Praise? Almost never."
This was typical for hosts. Their manuals suggested options like muting or blocking systems for undisturbed use—features hosts instinctively employed.
After all, unless joking or seeking specific responses, who'd praise smart speakers? Manuals never mentioned compliments boosting performance.
Recognizing a prime proselytizing moment, Qian Dafa adopted a mentor's tone.
"Jiang, remember—trees long for calm but winds won't cease; children wish to care but parents may depart. Neglect the cat balls, and they'll drift away. When you finally want to pamper them... it'll be too late!"
At "cat balls," Jiang Zhuo's gaze instinctively shifted to groove-dwelling 6666, who blinked at him expectantly.
I want praise.
Even a little would do.
Just a tiny bit.
Jiang Zhuo: "..."
Qian Dafa bellowed beside him, "Jiang! Your eyes changed! Join the Cat Ball Deity faith with me!"
Sheng Songshi strode urgently through the mission hall with his expression tense. His searching gaze darted about until Zheng Xibei caught up, pointing, "Brother Sheng, it's the right-side annex."
Reaching the door, Sheng Songshi pushed it open forcefully!
His urgency was justified—fresh from a mission, he'd received Zhou Yuechu's startling message—
[Brother Sheng, Ji Yiwei wants the entire White Bird Project.]
Although Sheng Songshi had told Zhou Yuechu before entering the mission world that no matter what, they should try their best to fulfill Ji Yiwei's wishes—whether it was items, skills, or hard-to-obtain resources—they could promise anything. As long as Ji Yiwei was willing to join them, even as a free-spirited external member, it would be acceptable.
But the price they were willing to pay would never include the entire White Bird Project.
It was like a king recruiting warriors, promising gold and treasures, only for the warrior to smile and say he wanted very little—just the kingdom beneath his feet.
What an outrageous demand!
This was a price they absolutely could not accept. So the moment Sheng Songshi emerged from the mission, he wanted to talk to Ji Yiwei. Yet Ji Yiwei had chosen this exact moment to enter another mission, leaving Sheng Songshi feeling like he'd punched cotton—utterly powerless.
...Perhaps he shouldn't have tried to recruit Ji Yiwei in the first place.
This thought flickered through Sheng Songshi's mind for just a second before he forcefully pushed open the door to the lounge. The scene before him, however, left him stunned—
Some hosts were holding popcorn, others had straws from soda cups in their mouths. The atmosphere resembled a large-scale party. At the sound of the door opening, they all turned blankly toward Sheng Songshi, who stood at the entrance breathing heavily and his expression tense.
Sheng Songshi: "..."
Jiang Zhuo was the first to stand up. He called out, "Mr. Sheng," then asked politely, "Would you like some popcorn?"
"Don't give him any," Qian Dafa said with disdain. "I paid for this popcorn. I'm not sharing it with an enemy of the Cat Ball Church... Sheng Songshi! You're neglecting your Cat Ball again!"
"Hosts shouldn't spend too much time with their systems," Sheng Songshi replied with a deep frown.
After the mission ended, he had immediately dismissed System 1001 and activated Do Not Disturb mode. He had never understood Qian Dafa's obsession with systems, let alone Ji Yiwei's constant attachment to his.
Zheng Xibei, who had System 2222 clinging to his shoulder nearby: "..."
He carefully tucked the Cat Ball into his pocket.
Sheng Songshi glanced at the small screen on Jiang Zhuo's chair. Ji Yiwei had already cleared out most of the amusement park, entered the director's office to activate all the park's facilities, and incidentally uncovered the truth. Now, he was leisurely descending the stairs. The flowing lights from the amusement park outside cast shifting patterns on Ji Yiwei's face, making the shape of his lips clearly visible.
Sheng Songshi read them silently.
"San-san... okay?... San-san... look..."
In the few minutes it took to walk down the stairs, Ji Yiwei had muttered "San-san" at least a few dozen times.
Sheng Songshi couldn't comprehend this kind of host-system relationship.
But at least the mission was complete, and Ji Yiwei would soon emerge from the mission world—just in time for a proper discussion.
—Except Ji Yiwei had no intention of leaving!
The ghosts and monsters in the amusement park had either been destroyed or sealed away.
After flipping the switch in the director's office, all the rides had resumed normal operation.
Ji Yiwei sat on the edge of the fountain, listening to the soft, melancholic singing. He didn't sit in the center but off to one side, leaving space in a hamburger wrapper box just big enough for a Cat Ball.
[I'm already sitting in the box!]
System 2333 announced loudly, as if playing house.
[I'm eating the hamburger now!]
He picked up the hamburger-flavored supplement and took several big gulps.
Ji Yiwei smiled, then unwrapped the hamburger beside him and took a bite. A sorrowful female voice wailed like a lament.
"Ah~ It hurts so much~ My head~"
The BGM at this moment was passionately provided by the singing fountain—a poor female ghost who hadn’t even had the chance to start her haunting project before Ji Yiwei sniped off half her ghostly head from a distance. Now, half-dead, she lay sprawled on the ground and moaning in a sing-song voice.
Ji Yiwei thought it sounded quite nice. Most importantly, San San also liked it, so the singer was temporarily spared.
The singer rolled her eyes violently at an angle no human could achieve.
"Damn you~ you cursed couple~"
Ji Yiwei paused mid-bite, then smiled faintly.
"San San, I suddenly think the BGM is a bit too loud. Should we turn it off?"
Turn it off—physically.
As in, stomp the ghost’s head flat.
The singer, sprawled on the ground, choked mid-wail and immediately reformed her ways. She didn’t want to die!
"La~ la la~~"
Estimating that San San had finished his supplement and the set time was almost up, Ji Yiwei looked up.
System 2333’s main screen followed Ji Yiwei’s line of sight and also tilted upward. At that moment, all the lights in the amusement park went out, revealing a vast and dazzling starry sky on System 2333’s screen.
Like Restricted Zone 306, the amusement park was a fragmented mission world—just a single amusement park and nothing more. But precisely because of this detachment from reality, it boasted an unpolluted, boundless starry sky.
Bright stars filled System 2333’s electronic screen, his vertical-line eyes and tears of emotion drowned in the sea of stars.
The host was the system’s window—Ji Yiwei was his window.
When he was locked inside a tiny cubicle, his eyes still reflected the sky seen through Ji Yiwei’s gaze.
And it wasn’t just him.
All the cat-ball systems were the same.
The cat-balls followed their hosts, stepping onto new lands. What the hosts saw, they saw; the hosts’ breaths were their breaths. If the host died… it was their failure, and they would follow them into death.
"San San, is it beautiful?"
To give him a clearer view, Ji Yiwei didn’t even blink.
[Mhm! It’s beautiful!]
System 2333 replied while secretly wiping the tears off his screen.
[I’ve already set it as my wallpaper!]
In the side hall, the other hosts also saw the full expanse of the starry sky.
They didn’t know Ji Yiwei had prepared this specifically for System 2333, but they couldn’t help but sigh—it had been so long since they’d quietly admired the stars themselves.
Though the Main System didn’t impose strict mission quotas on hosts, most hosts, eager to save up enough retirement points, followed the system’s task indicators, diving into dangerous and terrifying worlds, constantly running for their lives. And recently, the Main System had also imposed time limits on how long hosts could stay in the Main System space, forcing them to complete missions even faster.
Sheng Songshi also gazed at the starry sky, lost in thought. But for him, it only strengthened his resolve.
The White Bird Plan must be executed.
They had to break free from the control of the Main System and the systems.
The small screen's image first froze, then vanished—Ji Yiwei had finally concluded this mission world.
Sheng Songshi promptly stood up, intending to wait at the exit of the Miniature Garden.
No, he wouldn't go alone. He planned to station several people there as backup, anticipating that Ji Yiwei might try to shake them off.
As Sheng Songshi moved, Zheng Xibei naturally followed. However, the red System, 2222 hovering on his shoulder floated down and spoke in the standard system phraseology:
"Host, this is where we part ways."
Zheng Xibei, fully immersed in the moment, nodded solemnly.
"Mm! The green hills remain, the rivers flow on, we..."
"Shall meet again someday!"
The two goofballs finished the line in unison before resolutely turning and walking their separate ways.
2222 didn’t just leave its host—it also coaxed away 1818 and 6666, their bond forged through shared dancefloor antics. Together, they went to wait for San-san!
As System 2333 was transporting Ji Yiwei back, it suddenly heard him ask softly:
"San-san, do you like this gift?"
Not just the starry sky, but the amusement park that was meticulously cleaned.
Yet, Systemb2333 had already tried—it seemed impossible to claim the entire amusement park for itself. Even after straining with all its might, it only managed to dig up the musical fountain where it had once sat with Ji Yiwei.
A bit of a shame, but still wonderful!
A fountain!
Its Gobi Desert now had water!
With the harbinger of doom finally gone, the sprawled-out Songstress slowly curled herself up, flipping over. After catching her breath, she began crawling back toward her fountain.
—Only for her bony, bloodstained hand to grasp at empty air.
Songstress Ghost: "???"
Refusing to believe it, she groped around again, but her fingers still met nothing.
With great effort, the ghost lifted her head to look in the direction where the fountain should have been.
The pitch-black amusement park was now devoid of ghosts—even the park director was dead—leaving her utterly alone that were desperately searching for her fountain.
Where was her fountain?
Where was her massive, glorious fountain?!
Author's Note:
Ghost: Damn it! Who dug up my home?!
(He can't take everything because this isn’t the Edge World~)
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